don't bug me, it's a love letter.

(in which my heart strings are pulled and i am temporarily rendered a hopeful romantic)

i did meet a nice boy. that i am hanging out...i mean, dating.... a lot. i think i like him. i think he likes me. when we are together, it's starting to feel that something that's inexplicable: i don't really know him at all, but i feel like we are familiar. is this the man that i will eventually fall in love with, forever? or will we date for a few months and call it even and done, or will he break my heart? who knows, literally the possibilities are endless...

the beginnings of a relationship are always so fragile and awkward, at least in my heart- not necessarily in person (although, yes, i am awkward more often than not in the beginning). i don't know how much he likes me; i don't know the 'norm' for how often we talk, or hang out; i don't want to play games but also don't want to give in to my every whim to talk or hang out, nor do i want to 'play hard to get'. i also am trying my hardest, ooooh my little hardest, to not psychoanalyze him (although he's asked me to). this is the hardest part, really, of dating, i think for me: not over analyzing or over thinking or being too picky or... you know? i'm going to be honest: it's typically harder to date as you get older cause you know what you want, and what you will and will not put up with. so take that, and add in my neurotic ability to analyze every, single, boy i meet for future potential, and it's the perfect storm for crazy making. that said, i've been good (i think) at staying even keeled with this boy, and keeping my crazy in check. but still, living in the middle- just being me-can be a little unsettling.

so i'm being patient. and continuing my prayers for my future husband, and knowing that he will find me at the same time i find him.

and what does a bug drawing have to do with this beautiful, romantic sentiment??

adorable magnet from my dear african queen friend, cs.