go eat pies.

...

so for my baby shower a while back, i requested that guests bring books as gifts or cards. i really wanted to stock up on the baby's library, and have lots of fun options to read to my little one. i especially loved the idea of having my friends favorite childhood books as a gift to my new little reader. side note: if you're in the mood to take advice and needing a baby shower idea, i would highly recommend organizing this for a mama-to-be.  it's been such a blessing- we got so many books, many of which i would have never thought to purchase myself!

one of my many favorites has to be a little 'It's a Small World' set from my friend Michelle... four little board books with super colorful illustrations that introduce a little diversity into my monkey-head's little world. i like them because a of all, monkey-head loves them. b of all,  they are thin and book-like, c,  they are colorful, and d, they actually have real words (even sentences!) that make sense and don't get stuck in my head.

now don't get me wrong, i love that 'hippos go berserk' and animals have 'barnyard dances' and nonsensical stuff like that (thank you sandra boynton!) but seriously, sometimes a mom needs a little reality in her life: i don't love it when husband tells monkey-head to, 'stomp your feet' and i finish his sentence with 'clap your hands, everybody ready for a BARNYARD DANCE!' and break into a do-si-do.

enter 'It's a Small World' here...

the way these little books work is each title introduces the 'theme' of the book, and each page introduces a new country and a generic association to that country, matching the theme. 

let's look at 'let's eat' for example:

first we visit france, where, obviously, pierre is going to eat bread and cheese:

then we go to china, where ling should, of course, eat noodles:

off to mexico, where everyone knows rosa should eat quesadillas at every meal:

then we whisk away to italy, for a hearty dish of spaghetti and meatballs with dario: 

lastly, we get to visit america, where good ol' katie eats nothing but PIES:

wait wait WAIT a minute- PIES?? i mean seriously. i'm not saying that everyone in france eats bread and cheese every day, and that mexicans view quesadillas as a staple to their daily diet, but come on- at least all the previously mentioned food items are all meal-worthy. why oh why does fat ol' katie eat dessert for lunch? now, i get it on the surface: pies are quintessential americana, especially if they are made of apples, and it fits in with the somewhat generic food theme. but for goodness sake. if dario gets a hearty dinner and ling gets to slurp up yummy asian noodles for lunch, why can't katie at least eat hamburgers? or macaroni and cheese? or chicken nuggets? or something that at least consists of a meal? why is she eating dessert when everyone else in the book gets something substantial?

i know, i know. i need to get over it. it's a kid's book for goodness sake, and i doubt my monkey-headed son is going to start asking for pie for dinner because that's what american katie eats. i need to just move on. but for some reason whenever we get to this page, i read it with such disdain, such mocking tones in my voice. sometimes i even read it with my fat girl voice, like i'm too busy stuffing my own face with pie to read it clearly. 

now that i've ranted, i can move on. i just had to share my loathing for katie and her pies with the world so i could get over it, and move on to being irked by other stupid things, like why a turkey wearing a yellow hat and purple socks diving into a pool constitutes an 'oops' when a chicken wearing the same outfit but different colors is totally fine. or why three pigs sing 'la la la'. or why the animals bathe and brush their teeth and then exercise before bed (again, thank you sandra boynton!). 

ps don't read kid books with expectations